Severed Ties
by Lily1986
Summary: Set after Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Everything has changed. Betrayal is imminent. But who can you trust when you can't even tell friend from foe anymore? SPOILERS.
1. HAIL HYDRA!

**A.N: This one-shot has VERY strong spoilers sprinkled throughout. Spoilers for both the TV show and Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Please do not read this unless you're both caught up with the show and you've already watched the movie. But if you don't mind being spoiled, then go for it... read my theory on what's to come. Hope you like it!=]**

* * *

Ward glanced up with a smile when he heard the door opening again. He frowned when he found Coulson looming in the doorway and stood up. "Are you back to accuse me some more?"

"Hardly." Coulson answered curtly. "I need you downstairs. Skye and Fitz are waiting."

"And May?" Ward asked when he saw the petite woman step inside the room wearing handcuffs. His eyes snapped to Coulson. "What the hell is going on?"

"Downstairs… now." Coulson ordered, moving aside to make room for him to leave.

Ward passed by her in silence but urged her to say something, anything, with his eyes. She gave him a cold, hard stare before letting her eyes fall to the floor. He left the interrogation room and headed to the cargo bay like Coulson had instructed.

* * *

He was frowning as he listened to Coulson explain why May was currently locked up. There was no way that she was a traitor. He knew her well. So did Coulson. May wouldn't betray the team. He finally spoke up on her behalf. "May wouldn't do that, sir. If she says that she was reporting to Director Fury then I believe her. And so should you."

"Given the nature of your relationship with her, Agent Ward, you'll have to forgive me if I can't take your opinion on the matter at face value."

Ward felt himself blush before lowering his gaze. He could feel Fitz and Skye's eyes on him. This wasn't how they were supposed to find out. Especially her.

"Regardless of my relationship status with Agent May, I still believe her." He said through clenched teeth.

"I didn't ask you here to get your opinion on the matter." Coulson continued. "We need to find out where this plane is going and we need to get control back. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be in the cockpit… Fitz…. You're with me."

Ward watched the two of them leave the lab and take the stairs two at a time. He turned back to the only other person still in the room with him. "Skye…"

"You've been sleeping with May?"

He sucked in a breath. "I was sleeping with May. Not anymore."

"How long?" she asked softly.

His eyes scanned her demeanor. She was very calm. Even for Skye. "Since Ireland…"

She licked her bottom lip before nodding in understanding. "Oh."

Turning to leave, she stepped around the table that separated them. Ward grasped her arm, stopping her from leaving the lab. "That's all over now… it's been over… it should never have happened."

"But it did…" she said pulling her arm back from his grasp. "It happened and it continued to happen despite…"

"Despite what?"

"Nothing."

"Skye…"

"I opened up to you in Ireland… I tried to be your friend." She continued. "You could have just said you already had someone warming your bed so I would have made a complete ass of myself."

"Skye… I…"

"Don't apologize." She stopped him. "You actually have nothing to apologize for… you're just my Supervising Officer… You don't owe me an explanation."

She stepped around him as he watched her leave.

* * *

His eyes locked with hers as soon as he opened the door. He lifted the bottle of whiskey in his hand with a sad smile. "I figured you could use a drink."

She gave him an uncharacteristic smile in return. "Thank you."

Sitting down across from her, he poured them each some of the amber liquid before sliding one of the tumbler glasses toward her. "Is it true?"

She looked up from the drink in her hand and shook her head slowly. "I didn't betray all of you."

He nodded knowingly. "I know that. I meant if it was true that you've been reporting to Director Fury."

She lowered her gaze. "Yes."

"All this time?"

"Yes."

"But May… something is happening… where is Fury now?"

She shook her head. "I don't know."

"How do we get in contact with him?" Ward asked. "How do we find him?"

"I. Don't. Know."

He leaned back. "Someone is trying to control this plane… I think Fitz is getting back the control… but when we land… Coulson is ready to turn you in… I need to know that you're going to be okay when he does."

"I'll be okay."

"I'm going to try to talk to Coulson again… I'm not exactly his favorite person at the moment… but maybe he'll listen to me…"

"I appreciate that, Ward."

He stretched his hand across the table, taking hers and holding it tightly. "I am here for you…"

"Thank you."

* * *

He stepped out of the room and came face to face with Skye.

"How is she?" she asked.

"She's holding up…"

"You really care about her, don't you?"

"She's my friend, Skye."

"She's lucky to have you then…" she mumbled before walking around him.

* * *

Skye was typing on a laptop in the lab when Fitz walked in. She looked up and frowned at his saddened face.

"Hey…" she greeted. "You okay?"

"I can't reach Jemma…" Fitz said. "When the line cut off… I've been trying to get in touch with her but I can't."

Skye stood up and walked toward him putting a hand on his shoulder. She tried to reassure him with a bright smile. "She's going to be fine… Triplett is with her… He'll protect her."

Fitz nodded absentmindedly. "What about you? Are you okay?"

Skye let her hand drop. "I'm not sure I understand what you mean…"

"I'm talking about what happened earlier… between you and… he who must not be named…"

Skye cracked a smile before shaking her head. "We haven't really spoken…"

"Skye…"

"He lied, Fitz."

"When?" Fitz asked. "Did he blatantly tell you he wasn't sleeping with May even though he was?"

"Well… no…"

"Then when did he lie?"

"He didn't tell me… therefore, it was omission… and omission and lying are totally the same thing…" she knew she was grasping at straws but she was hurt and she hated feeling hurt.

Fitz raised his eyebrows.

"Don't look at me like that…" she mumbled before sitting back down in front of the laptop.

"First of all, omission… keeping secrets… it's kind of our thing…" he said with a soft smile. "And second of all, have you ever bloody wondered why he would be so careful to keep this from you… of all people…?

She looked up at him with a shrug. "Because he was embarrassed?"

"Or because he didn't want you to know about it…" Fitz shook his head. "I'm sure he has his reasons…"

"I like the idea of him being embarrassed actually."

"That's fine." Fitz shrugged. "You can keep that as the official reason then." She rolled her eyes. "Or… you can ask him… and give him a chance to explain."

"Since when are you on Team Ward?" Skye asked.

"I'm on Team Whoever Saves My Life Countless Times…." Fitz said with a laugh. "Ward is a good man, Skye… he cares a lot about you… and I know you have feelings for him. He should know."

"But what if he loves her, Fitz?"

"Then they'd be together…" he whispered. "But they're not… and you owe it to yourself and to him to find out why."

She nodded before standing and touched his shoulder softly as she passed by. "She'll call."

"I know." He said, looking up with a smile. "Now go…"

She let herself smile and walked out of the lab.

* * *

The knock on his bunk's door made him jump. "Come…" he cleared his throat. "Come in…"

She poked her head through a small gap. "Is this a bad time?"

He sat up straighter on his bed and shook his head. "Not at all…"

The corner of her lip turned upwards as she walked into the darkened bunk and slid the door closed behind her. The room was in complete darkness now so she stayed firmly planted by the door.

"Skye?"

"Yeah?"

"The light switch is behind you… if you want to…"

She flipped the switch immediately and the room was flooded with light.

"Sorry about that…"

"Don't apologize…" he shook his head. "Is there something you need?"

"To talk to you?"

He scooted over on his bed before patting the mattress next to him. Skye followed his signal and sat on the bed next to him, leaning her head against the wall. He watched her quietly, waiting for her to steer the conversation.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She just wanted to jump right in then.

"I'm sor-"

"Don't apologize to me…" she turned toward him. "I just want to know why you felt that you had to keep your relationship in the dark… from me…"

He scratched his head. "I don't know."

"Did you not trust me?"

"What?! Of course I trust you, Skye! I trust you with my life!"

"Then…" she turned toward him. "Why did Coulson know and I didn't?"

"May told Coulson… not me…" he defended. She glared at him and he let out a deep breath. "I guess I just didn't want you to know…"

"Why though?"

"Because I didn't want you to look at me the way you're looking at me right now…"

"What way is that?" she asked softly.

"Like I'm not good enough…."

"Ward…" she whispered.

"I get it." He frowned. "My whole life, I've been told what a screw up I was… When I joined S.H.I.E.L.D, I knew I had trust issues. It's why I decided to be a Specialist. The job is lonely but it's also easier."

"Easier than what?"

"Than getting attached to others." He answered. "You can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in."

She nodded in understanding. She'd had the same philosophy growing up.

"But then you literally stormed into our lives… my life… and suddenly… I realized what it meant to be a part of a team… a family…" he shrugged. "I didn't want to jeopardize that. I realized I wanted to be better. You made me want to do better. I didn't just want to keep doing what I'd been doing… I wanted to be different. You changed my mind on a lot of what I was taught to believe since I first joined… S.H.I.E.L.D."

She watched him as he spoke and bit her lip to keep her jaw from quivering.

"What May and I had was purely physical…" he continued. "I'm sorry that I kept it from you. I'm sorry that you found out the way that you did. May and I are friends. We've bonded over our time on this plane… but whatever friendship I have with May, it's nothing compared to-"

"To what?" she asked, silently urging him to continue.

"It's nothing compared to the connection that you and I have…"

She gasped when he said the words. She knew Ward wasn't the romantic type. He wasn't going to declare undying love with Shakespearean dialogue. But what he just confessed, he might as well have told her that he loved her. She knew it but she still needed to hear him say the words.

"Why did you end things with May?" she asked.

"Skye…"

"Did she end them with you?'

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Are you sure you want to know the answer to that?"

She nodded. "I need to hear the answer to that."

He mimicked her nod. "Fair enough…. Lorelei told her that I desired another…"

"Another… what, exactly?"

"Another… team member…." He finished.

Her jaw dropped.

"I guess while I was under Lorelei's control, I confessed to having feelings for someone on my team and I specified that it was not May… Lorelei told her, May broke off our arrangement…"

"Who?"

"What?" he asked in confusion.

"Who did you desire?"

"You mean who do I desire?" he asked with a slow smile. "Present tense…"

"Yeah…. Okay… who….?"

He shook his head and leaned closer to her face. "You…" he breathed.

They wouldn't be able to tell you who initiated the kiss that night. Skye likes to believe that it was her that made the first move but Ward is convinced that he'd closed the gap between them. As their lips battled for dominance, Ward lowered Skye on the mattress beneath him. He kissed from her lips to her jaw, down to her neck eliciting a moan from deep within her throat. The sound jerked him to attention and he sat back away from her.

"What?" she breathed heavily. "What's wrong?"

"I… I just… now isn't a good time…"

"Now's not a good time?!" she screeched. "Are you freaking kidding me?"

"I don't want to just jump into bed with you… I've done that once already…" he explained. "I want to do this right… Go slow… Preferably when we're not in the middle of a civil war…"

She rolled her eyes before scooting off the bed and standing in front of him. "There will always be some kind of war going on, Ward… there will always be bad guys… if you're planning on waiting for the world to be a better place in order to start living your life, then you'll be waiting forever."

She turned to leave but he grabbed her hand. "I just want to wait until you and I are both in a better place. I don't want our first time together to be in the middle of a high tension battle…."

She let herself smile slowly. "Why? The best ones always start that way…"

"Maybe, maybe not…" he shrugged. "All I know is that I want to wait for the right moment… And I don't want to have to keep this a secret… when all the pieces are lined up, then we can put them together."

"Pieces solving a puzzle?"

He let himself smile. "I told you once that you and I see the world differently…"

"I don't know…" she shrugged. "I think you're starting to see the world a little differently from what you used to…"

"I actually think you're right…" he frowned.

She leaned up on her tip toes and kissed the corner of his mouth with a smile. "Goodnight, Agent Ward."

He watched her slip out of his bunk with guilt etched on his face. She slid the bunk door closed just as he heard a soft beep from within his bunk. He strode over to the bed and lifted the mattress, finding the hidden phone. His eyes widened when he received the message.

_Mission Activated. Good luck. Hail H.Y.D.R.A._

Ward looked up from the message and set his jaw. It was time.


	2. Demons, They Fill You With Fear

A.N: This was meant to be a one-shot but given the events within tonight's episode and the fact that my one-shot is practically canon, I figured I'd continue it... Why the hell not? Hope that's okay! ;-)

* * *

He'd been looking over the blueprints with Garrett for a while now when the phone in his pocket rang. Garrett looked up with confusion before shaking his head. "I thought I told you to toss that. They can trace it."

"Yes, sir." Ward nodded looking down at the Caller I.D.

Garrett frowned before nodding toward the small device in his rookie's hand. "Answer it."

"Sir?"

"It's not the first time she's called." Garrett continued. "It won't be the last. They know who you really are by now… end it… and then toss that damn phone, son."

Ward nodded watching the older man walk away. He took a deep breath before sliding his thumb across the screen where her smiling face was looking back at him.

"Skye-"

"What the hell?!" the shrill voice on the other end did not let him get another word out. "What the hell is going on?" she was whispering, which told him that she was making this call behind everyone's back. "They're saying you're a traitor… that you killed Agent Hand and are with Garrett… Grant… what is happening?"

He took a deep breath. "It's all true."

There was silence on the other line that caused him to close his eyes and rub his face.

"You're HYDRA?" she whispered in disbelief.

"Yes."

"How long?" she asked.

"What?"

"How long have you been lying to us?" she asked again. "A day? A month? The entire time?"

"Skye-"

"You know that Fitz stood up for you… Fitz and Jemma both stood up for you…" she continued. "Not to mention May and me… hell, even Coulson said there was no way that any of it could be true. Not you…"

He stayed quiet enough that he could hear a choked sob. The sound shattered his heart but he knew he needed to break her own heart to keep her safe.

"Was any of it real?" she finally asked him. "That kiss? Asking me for a drink? Was that real? Or were you just playing me?"

He didn't answer right away. The truth was that it was all real. His feelings for her had always been real. That's what scared him. He'd been taught to not get attached, to stay away from people and never let anyone in. It's why he wasn't a team player. It's why he was so against being put on Coulson's team. There was darkness inside of him that he never wanted anyone to see. So he lied. For her sake and for the sake of the team. He started this mission with Garrett. There would always be a loyalty to Garrett. But he'd be lying if he said he didn't care about that rag tag team he played Scrabble with. Or the rookie hacktivist that he'd spent months training. Or even the warrior with the heart of ice who he used to stay off their radar. He cared about them all. And that's why he lied.

"No…" he choked on his own words. "It wasn't real… none of it. I needed to distract you and I did."

"Go to hell." She whispered with anger before disconnecting the line.

"I'm already there." He mumbled as he looked down at the phone in his hand.

He looked up to find Garrett watching him from across the room with a smug grin. He nodded toward a furnace and Ward understood his meaning before it dawned on him what he was about to do. The moment he tossed that phone in the fire would be the moment that he'd let them all go. It would mean severing all ties to the life he had before today. It would mean saying goodbye to the family he'd chosen and the only woman he'd ever loved.

He squeezed the small phone in his hand one last time before throwing it all away. It was over now. She'd never look at him the same way again. She'd never look up at him with those stars in her eyes. She'd no longer trust him.

He'd devoted his entire life to this organization. Garrett recruited him at the darkest and lowest point of his life. HYDRA had saved him. He owed Garrett his life. They turned him into the man he was now. But who is that man? Is he really a cold blooded killer who's killed two innocent people in two days? Or is he the tortured anti-hero who's got his own motivations for doing the things that he does? The truth was that he didn't know anymore. He didn't even know who he was until he met her. And now that he's lost her for good he feels that he's lost the part of him that he'd somehow found on that airplane.

He looked up to find Garrett waving him over. They had company.

* * *

She threw the phone against the wall and watched it shatter as she slid down the wall behind her. She folded her arms on her knees and cried. She cried for him. She cried because of him. She cried in spite of him. He'd broken her heart. And he didn't even care. She sucked in a breath when she felt another presence in the room and looked up at the visitor with dark rimmed eyes.

"For all intents and purposes, he taught you well." May said with her eyes scanning the room until they landed on the shattered pieces of what used to be Skye's phone. "You threw your phone."

Skye stood up. "I didn't think I'd need it anymore."

"Skye…"

"I called him…" she bit her lip to keep it from trembling. "I called him and it was like talking to a complete stranger. I didn't even recognize him…"

"Oh Skye…"

"I know what everyone was saying…" she continued. "But I needed to confirm it for myself… I needed to know…"

"And did you?" May asked. "Confirm it?"

Skye nodded. "The Grant Ward we both knew is gone."

"Or maybe this is who Grant Ward has always been and the man we knew was a fraud."

"I refuse to believe that…" Skye shook her head. "I can't shake this feeling that he let us see the real him… at least a happier version of himself…"

"Maybe…." May said with a shrug. "All I know is that he can no longer be trusted… but Skye…" the younger woman looked up from the ground. "He tricked all of us… Not just you."

Skye nodded. "It still hurts…"

May closed the gap between them and did the most uncharacteristic thing Skye had ever seen the older woman do. She hugged her. It took Skye a moment to realize that it was Melinda May's arms wrapped around her in comfort and not Jemma's. She squeezed the warrior's shoulders before nodding and pulling back.

"Thank you…" she said rubbing her nose laughing. "I must look like a mess."

May shook her head with a small smile. "You don't… but if you want to go wash up, I'll let everyone know that you'll be out in a minute."

She turned to leave when Skye called her back again.

"Thank you," Skye said with a smile. "I know you loved him too."

May felt the corner of her lips turn upward. "If you ever need to talk, I'm here."

Skye nodded. "I might take you up on that offer one of these days…"

She watched May duck out of the room and turned toward her bathroom in the small bunker they'd given her. She turned on the light and stood in front of the mirror with a slight frown. Her eyes were rimmed with red. There were tear stains down her cheeks. Her hair was knotted from pulling it so much. She did look a mess but she was grateful for May sugarcoating it for her.

First, she washed her face. It was methodical. Rinse. Lather. Rinse.

Then she brushed her hair slowly. The knots hurt but it was a welcome distraction from the ache in her heart. She could still feel his lips on hers. That was a kiss that had burned her. He'd branded her forever. She'd always be his and that scared her. Because what did that say about her. She'd fallen for the enemy. Granted, she didn't know that he was the enemy at the time but the outcome was still the same.

First it was Miles. She'd thought Miles was the worst she could do. But Grant was in entire different league of bad boys. He was the bad guy. His boss had her shot. All that crap about wanting to protect her, was just crap. He couldn't have actually cared when her life was hanging in the balance because if he did he wouldn't be helping the man who put her there.

When the knots in her hair were all gone, she stared at the brush blankly. She eyed all the hair that she'd pulled and wondered how she hadn't even felt it. She was numb. That was the only explanation. Everything that had happened in the last couple of days left her numb.

She'd once told him that she didn't earn a place at S.H.I.E.L.D. She'd hacked her way unlike everyone else whose name was on the Wall of Valor. She closed her eyes. Agent Avery. Was she HYDRA too? Tossing the brush in the sink, she came to a decision.

She'd given Ward all the intel they'd had on the plane before all hell broke loose. Including some files about Agent Avery and what happened to her. Ward didn't know she was an 0-8-4 but with everything that S.H.I.E.L.D tried to keep secret out in the open, it was only a matter of time before he put two and two together. Garrett wanted her for something. That much had been obvious. It was time they'd found out what made her so special. She needed to tell the rest of the team the truth despite what Coulson and May had advised against.

When she walked into the dining room, both Fitz and Simmons looked up trying to smile. Coulson's smile brightened his face despite all the bad stuff that was happening around them. And May hadn't stopped looking at Coulson.

"Skye?" Coulson asked when he caught her walking toward them with complete determination. "What's wrong?"

"Ward has the hard drive."

It took Coulson a moment before he realized what she meant. He shook his head and looked up at her. "It's not your fault. We all trusted him too-"

"I know…" she said. "That's not why I mentioned it…"

He glanced at May before turning back to Skye. "I'm not following…"

"Ward doesn't know everything and I didn't put a very important piece of information about me in that hard drive…"

"You mean…" May started.

"Where I came from…" Skye nodded. "He doesn't know."

"What are you saying?" Coulson asked.

"To stay one step ahead of him… them…" she corrected herself. "We have to find out everything there is to know about where I came from…" she glanced at Fitz and Simmons with an apologetic look before turning back to Coulson. "We need to find out why I'm an 0-8-4."


	3. Kingdom Come

**A.N: **I guess I'm on a roll or something... this last episode has left we with so much angst that I just need to get out. I'm not too in love with this chapter... but it's necessary to move the plot along... I know what everyone wants... for Ward and Skye to come face to face again after all that's happened... I hate to say it, but it's going to be a while before that happens. Next chapter, they'll be in the same place though so we're definitely getting closer... I' don't pretend to own the show (although I wish) so all that I write is from my own imagination... including what I write as Skye's origin story and what her being an 0-8-4 actually means... But hopefully, it's something that you all will enjoy... As always, reviews/comments (good and bad) are welcome... I love to know what you all think...

* * *

The knock on the door caused her to look up from the screen in front of her. She smiled when she found Simmons standing in the doorway. "Hey…"

"Hi…" Simmons greeted her. "Can we talk?"

Skye closed the laptop and set it aside. "I was waiting for when you'd come looking for me… I almost expected you to send in Fitz though…"

Simmons smiled sadly. "How are you?"

"Me?" Skye asked rubbing her thighs. "I just found out that Hydra has infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D., that my own S.O. is a part of Hydra and that all of my secrets are out there for all to see… so technically, I'm not even safe anymore… I'm feeling grand."

"Stop it."

Skye was taken aback. "Stop what?"

"Stop hiding behind your sarcasm and wit." Simmons continued before stepping further into the room. "You're hurt. And that's okay… Skye, he lied to us all… not just you… he tricked some of the best people in S.H.I.E.L.D., including Director Fury and Commander Hill. He had us all fooled. They both did."

Skye rubbed her face before looking up at Simmons with a small smile. "I know."

"Oh…" Simmons started. "I'm so sorry… just May said that you were beating yourself up earlier and I thought I would come and…."

"Give me a stern talking to?" Skye asked with a widened smile.

Simmons sat down next to Skye, taking her hand in hers. "I promise that we'll get through this… we will survive like Coulson said… We'll stop them."

"I know we will…"

"Skye…?" Simmons started. "Why didn't you tell us? About being an 0-8-4?"

"I couldn't…" Skye frowned. "I was trying to protect you…"

"I'm not angry…" Simmons explained. "I don't know how I feel… but I know I'm not angry…"

"Are you scared?"

Simmons smiled softly. "No."

Skye squeezed her hands when another knock startled her. She looked up to find Coulson standing in front of them. "Simmons, can I have a word with Skye? Alone?"

Simmons nodded, smiling at Skye before standing and walking out the door.

Coulson closed the door behind him and turned to Skye. "We're going to China."

"What?" Skye asked.

"That's where the village you came from is…" Coulson shrugged. "May and I spoke about it… and we both agreed…" he looked at her with a slight frown. "That you're right… whatever is in China, if there is anything in China… we need to get our hands on it first."

Skye raised her eyebrows with a smile. "You got a plan, AC?"

He nodded. "Same protocol… we only trust each other… no one else."

"You sure we can?" Skye asked. "The last time we trusted each other, things didn't go so well…"

"I'm sure… now pack up… wheel's up in thiry."

* * *

He paced the room and shuddered. It was cold and damp down here. And where the hell was Garrett? He'd left with Ian Quinn earlier and hadn't returned yet. It had taken every ounce of control for Ward not to snap Quinn's neck the moment he saw him when he and Garrett first arrived.

"I must admit… I didn't think I'd be seeing you here…"

He turned to find Raina smiling seductively at him.

"That means I played my part well…"

"Too well," she smirked. "Some would say…"

"Where's Garrett?"

"He and Ian aren't back yet…" she shrugged. "So, Agent Grant Ward… what made you switch sides?"

"Who says I switched sides?" he asked with a smug smirk of his own. "I was given a mission and I carried it out…"

She let a slow smile spread across her face. "Coulson's a good man…"

Ward's smile faltered.

"Don't you owe a man like that something…?"

"I don't owe Coulson… or S.H.I.E.L.D. for that matter anything…."

Raina chuckled menacingly. "No, of course not… Hail Hydra, right?"

Ward narrowed his eyes.

"What about the rest of the team?" Raina continued. "Those adorable scientists that you protected all those months, The Calvary who you carried on an affair with…"

"All part of the plan."

"And her?" Raina asked. "Was she _part of the plan_? What was her name again?"

Ward could feel his jaw lock and clenched his teeth to bite out, "Skye."

"Oh… right…" Raina said with a knowing smile. "Such a pretty name…"

Commotion coming from the other side of the room stopped their conversation. A smiling Garrett rounded the corner and walked straight to Ward, patting him on his back. "We got it… it was right where you said it would be."

"What was?" Raina asked.

"Ward here gave us a neat little machine that's going to cause some major mayhem, ain't that right, son?" Garrett slapped his back excitedly.

"Did he now?" Raina asked faking enthusiasm. "What does it do?"

"Changes the weather…" Ward explained. "Some kid at the Academy created it, Fitz perfected it."

"Interesting…"

"Damn right it is!" Garrett nodded. "I'm going to go make a twister…."

He carried the machine back out the door leaving Raina and Ward alone again.

"Nice of you to hand over such a dangerous weapon…" she said.

Ward shrugged. "It's what I was there for."

"Is that the only toy Coulson and his team confiscated?" she asked.

"It's all that I know about and considering I was there… every… single… day…" he stepped up right in front of her. "I should know, right?"

She smiled slowly. "Well then, I guess we're lucky to have you on our side."

He let himself smile. "Guess so."

"Hey Ward!" Garrett called out to him. "Get out here, man! You've got to see this!"

Ward gave Raina a slight nod before following Garrett's voice out of the room. Raina watched him walk away and took a deep breath before crossing her arms with a hard glare.

* * *

"So where do they think we're going?" Skye asked.

"Didn't say…" Coulson answered.

"And they're just letting us go?" she asked. "Just like that?"

"Why wouldn't they?" he turned toward her. "We're not their prisoners…"

"No… of course not… just with everything that's going on…" Skye started.

"They're on a need to know basis and they don't need to know…" Coulson answered. "As far as they're concerned, we're moving on… and we're going to keep moving… even after China…"

She nodded in understanding.

"You're in danger, Skye…" Coulson continued. "There's too much information about you out there and if anyone figured out that the 0-8-4 that went missing over 20 years ago is you, a lot of people are going to come looking for you… and we've got to be ready."

She nodded in understanding. "Yes, sir."

He turned to leave before turning back to her. "I know I haven't mentioned it…. But I am sorry… about Ward…"

She gave him a small smile. "Yeah, me too."

* * *

Raina watched the two of them walk back in and smiled over the computer in front of her.

"Well, don't you look like the cat that ate the canary…" Garrett grinned. "What did you find?"

"Apparently, one of your former S.H.I.E.L.D. comrades aired all of the agency's dirty laundry for everyone to see. … something particularly interesting caught my eye. Do you know what an 0-8-4 is?"

Ward and Garrett looked at each other before Garrett shrugged. "Sure, it's object of unknown origin… Why?"

"Because S.H.I.E.L.D. lost one…" she said with a smile. "Twenty-four years ago…"

"S.H.I.E.L.D. _lost_ an 0-8-4?" Ward asked. "How is that possible?"

Raina smiled. "I don't know… I was just a baby when this happened."

Ward glared at her.

"We should find it…" Garrett nodded. "It could be a weapon. I'd rather it be in our hands than theirs."

"Where is it?" Ward asked.

"Well, I don't know where it is… but I know where it came from…" Raina answered leaning over the screen again. "A small village… in China."


	4. I'd Burn a Thousand Moons to Light a Sun

A.N: This chapter is probably the longest so far... hope that's okay! ;)

* * *

"Are you sure we can trust him?" Skye nodded toward Agent Triplett who was standing off to the side with Simmons.

Coulson followed her gaze before turning back to her with a nod. "Yes… he's not Hydra…"

"But he worked with Garrett…"

"We all did, Skye…" Coulson reminded her. "Simmons vouches for him… and I believe him when he says he didn't know about Garrett or Ward."

She crossed her arms in frustration.

"What?"

"It just feels like…" she started and stopped.

"It feels like what?" Coulson prodded.

"It feels like we're replacing… you know… _him_…" she set her jaw. "Trading one specialist for another…"

Coulson shook his head. "I'm sorry you feel that way… but Skye…"

"No, I get it… we need someone like him…"

"That's not what I was going to say…" he cut her off.

Skye looked up at him with a frown.

"I was going to say…" he continued. "That Ward is gone… he's not the person that you used to know. He's not the guy that trained you in the mornings… he's changed… he switched sides… he betrayed us… and you're going to need to accept that…"

She bit her lip when she felt her eyes water and swallowed the tears that she refused to shed. "Fine."

"Hey…." Triplett called out to them. "Are we going? China's a long ways away…"

"Yeah… we're going…"

Coulson walked toward the duo with Skye trailing behind. She glanced at Simmons, who tried to smile.

"Fitz and May are already on board." Triplett told them. "May's about ready to go."

Coulson nodded. "Let's go to China…"

* * *

"What are the chances…" Garrett was saying while checking the guns in his hand. "Those morons would overlook an 0-8-4."

Ward was packing his own tactical gear. They'd arrived in China earlier that day and located the small village that Raina had sent them to. Ward numbly put on his vest and packed multiple guns on him. It felt weird to be carrying real guns now, with real bullets. Especially after months of using nothing but the night-night guns…. _I.C.E.R.S._, he chuckled to himself.

"Something funny, son?" Garrett narrowed his eyes.

"No, sir." Ward set his face again and continued getting ready.

"Do you think Coulson and his rag tag team will be there?" Garrett asked suddenly.

Ward stiffened for a moment before hiding another gun behind his back. "I don't see why they would be… Raina said anyone who wasn't dead or on our side has gone underground. I don't think a trip to China is at the top of Coulson's to do list right now…"

Garrett watched him carefully. "No… probably not…"

Ward could feel his eyes on his back.

"But if they were to cross paths with us…" Garrett started. "Maybe not today, not tomorrow… but one day… what are you going to do?"

Ward felt a cold chill trail his entire body. He schooled his features and turned toward Garrett. "You taught me to neutralize the threat… that's what I'm going to do…"

Garrett let a slow smile spread on his face. "I'm glad to hear it, son."

Ward nodded and turned back around. "So are we doing this or what?"

* * *

Skye nodded and walked away with more confusion than she'd ever felt. Lucky for them, May was with them to translate. The 6 of them regrouped away from the villagers. Coulson folded his arms looking around.

"I don't get it." He said. "No one is talking… it's like they're scared of something…"

"Maybe they're scared of me…" Skye frowned. "Of what I can do… I did kill all those people…"

May shook her head. "No, that's not it… this fear is different…"

"Sir…" Simmons spoke up. "What if Hydra was the group that had been looking for Skye?"

"We figured that to be the case already…" Fitz shook his head. He turned toward Skye. "There's got to be something else… I'd ask you if you remembered anything…."

She narrowed her eyes. "Really?"

"What?" Fitz took a stop back. "I'm nervous… I ramble when I'm nervous…"

"Oh Fitz!" Simmons called out in frustration.

"Let's all just calm down…" Triplett broke up the tension as best he could. "Someone here is going to talk… they have to… we just have to find the oldest person here…" he was looking around him until his eyes landed on a woman sitting on a rocking chair. "Bingo."

Skye turned to follow his gaze and rolled her eyes. "You want us to interrogate grandma?"

"You got anymore bright ideas?" Triplett asked.

"It's worth a shot…" May shrugged.

"Why? Because he said so?" Skye was asking.

Fitz spoke over her. "If she can even remember what she had for dinner last night…"

"Fitz!" Simmons chastised him.

Coulson and May eyed each other knowingly before Coulson whistled. "That's enough!"

Their young team members quieted abruptly.

"We'll talk to her…" Coulson said. "But if she can't give us anything, then we move on… we'll find what we're looking for… whatever that is…"

The rest of the team followed him and May as they approached the older woman. She was sitting next to a much younger man who was washing tools in front of their humble shack.

"Excuse me…?" Coulson called out softly trying not to startle them. "Do you speak English?"

The young man nodded. "Yes."

"Okay… good…" Coulson nodded. "We have some questions for your… grandmother?"

The young man nodded. "Yes… what sort of questions…?"

"About me…" Skye jumped in. "I think I was born here…"

The young man eyed her with confusion. "I've lived here my whole life… I do not recognize you…"

"I was taken away from here when I was a baby…." Skye explained. "I was wondering if your grandmother knew anything about that day…"

The older woman stood up suddenly and walked toward them pointing at Skye.

Her grandson's eyes widened. He called out to her softly but watched as she stepped right in front of Skye to cup her face in her hands before saying some words in Mandarin.

Skye looked back at him. "What did she say?"

"She says, 'welcome home'." He translated.

* * *

Cheng and his grandmother, Dao-Ming welcomed them to their home. Triplett and Simmons sat on one side of the room while Coulson, Fitz and May sat on the other. Skye sat at Dao-Ming's feet. The older woman had been recounting the events of the day that Skye was taken away.

"She says that your parents were not from this village…." Cheng was translating. "They were travelers who were just passing through…. She'd met them, invited them into this home… your mother was in her final stages of pregnancy with you…"

Skye swallowed thickly. Finally, after all this time… she was starting to find out where she came from and who her parents were.

"The birth was not natural…" Cheng continued with a frown. He asked Dao-Ming to explain in hushed words. He frowned at what he heard. "Your mother passed while giving birth to you… I am sorry…"

Skye felt a tear trickle down her face. "No, it's okay… please keep going…"

The rest of the team listened silently passing uncomfortable glances around at one another.

"Your father fled shortly after…" Cheng finished. "My grandmother took care of you until those men arrived to take you away…"

"What men?" Skye sat up.

"Probably S.H.I.E.L.D.," Coulson interrupted. "They probably caught wind of your birth and came looking…"

Cheng was nodding trying to follow his grandmother's story. "But that's not the only men that came looking." Dao-Ming was stroking Skye's face as she spoke. "My grandmother wanted to keep you… protect you… but they took you… that's when that other team arrived and everyone was fighting with each other…"

"Hydra…" Fitz whispered to May causing her to roll her eyes.

"But you protected yourself…" Cheng finished.

Skye snapped her eyes toward him. "How? I was just a baby… a few days old…"

He shook his head. "I'm not sure… she doesn't know… But one minute they were all poised to shoot and the next, they were dead."

"Did I kill them?" Skye asked.

Cheng frowned. "I don't know…" he was shaking his head. "My grandmother is very old… she's probably confusing reality with her imagination…"

Skye sat back stunned. Coulson moved to the floor and placed a comforting arm around her. She sobbed into his chest whispering over and over again.

"I'm a freak… I'm a freak… I'm a freak…"

Coulson looked back at May and she stood to attention. "It's time to go."

Coulson lifted Skye up and sheltered her in his arms. He guided her toward the door. "Thank you for your time…"

"Wait…." Cheng called out.

Coulson, Skye and the rest of the team turned toward him and Dao-Ming. The older woman walked slowly and stood in front of Skye again. She lowered the younger woman's head toward her and kissed her forehead. Skye gave her a watery smile. Dao-Ming answered in Mandarin.

"She says that you have great power within you…" Cheng translated. "In the wrong hands, it can be used for evil… but don't ever doubt that there is good in you too… those powers can be used for good one day. Do not fear what you are… embrace what you can be."

Skye smiled softly before hugging the older woman and whispering, "Thank you."

She let Coulson and the rest of the team lead her away after that.

* * *

Skye sat numbly on the plane. The aircraft carrier that they were on was smaller than they were used to by now. It didn't have bunks. They were forced to sleep in sleeping bags next to each other when May flew the plane. Coulson would relieve her whenever she'd let him. He was sitting in the cockpit with her, ready to relieve her if she needed him to.

The rest of the team was sleeping after that day's events as she stared straight ahead with her legs tucked into her chest. She jumped slightly when she felt someone sit down next to her.

"Hey…." Triplett whispered. "It's just me…"

Skye eyed him warily. "What is it?"

"I just wanted to see how you were…" Triplett frowned. "What you heard today was… pretty heavy…"

"I'm fine." She answered.

"Alright…"

"How would you feel if you searched your entire life for answers… where do I come from… who are my parents… are they even alive… did they want me…" she ranted. "Only to find out that one of them died giving birth to you and the other ran as fast as he could… and oh yeah… I apparently have some latent super powers that can _kill_ people…."

Triplett whistled. "Yeah… I feel you…"

Skye tossed a glare in his direction.

"But at least you know more now than you did this morning…"

"I know that I killed my own mom and a team from both Hydra and S.H.I.E.L.D." She frowned before cracking a smile. "Although, I can't say I'm too sad about those Hydra agents who were trying to kill me…"

He chuckled. "No, probably not."

She turned toward him. "What if I hurt you all?"

He shook his head. "You won't."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because you're a good person, Skye." Triplett answered. "And you love these people… Me, you're not too crazy about but I figure if I stand close enough to Coulson or Simmons, I should be alright."

Skye laughed softly trying not to wake Fitz and Simmons. "I don't hate you."

Triplett got serious. "I'm not here to replace him."

She turned toward him and smiled softly. "I know…"

"But if you want… I can pick up where he left off… I'm only Level 6 and I didn't know nearly as much as he did but I can… you know… train you… if you want that is…"

Skye smiled. "Thanks… but I'm not ready for that yet…"

Triplett nodded in understanding. "When you are… the offer is on the table."

"Thank you."

"I'm going back to sleep…" he said with a smile. "You should get some rest too."

Skye nodded. "I will."

She watched Triplett slip back into his sleeping bag next Simmons. It wasn't long before she was asleep too.

Neither one of them noticed that one of their sleeping team members was awake and listening to their conversation as she faked closed eyes and tossed around in her sleeping bag.

* * *

"Is this it?" Garrett asked.

Ward looked down at a map and nodded. "These are the coordinates Raina gave me…"

"Let's ask around then…" Garrett said walking further into the village. "Don't you speak Mandarin?"

"A little bit…" Ward nodded.

"Good…" Garrett smiled. "Because I'm not expecting to find anyone who speaks English in this place."

After a couple of hours of trying to get information from anyone, they both realized that no one was going to be talking to them.

"I feel like putting a bullet in each and every one of them for wasting my time." Garrett muttered.

"I'm not really in the mood to clean up today…" Ward answered. "Let's go… there's nothing here."

They turned around to leave when Ward's eyes landed on a younger man standing in front of a shack beating on an old rug. Ward jogged over to him, starting the man.

"Excuse me…" he started in Mandarin.

"I speak English…" the young man muttered. "You damn Americans always assume that no one else does."

"Damn Americans?" Garrett caught the end of his statement. "What Americans?"

Cheng glanced between the two of them. "I meant… in general…"

Garrett gave him a menacing smile before stepping into her personal space. "See, I don't think you did…"

Garrett pulled out a gun and held it Cheng's head.

"Garrett…" Ward warned starting to see a crowd form around them.

"You're going to tell my friend here what you meant by 'you damn Americans'… in English, please…" Garrett said through clenched teeth.

Cheng panicked and told them about the group that had been there earlier.

"How many of them?" Garrett asked.

"S… Si… Six…" Cheng stuttered.

Garrett let him go and snorted before turning to Ward. "Coulson… and it looks like they've got Trip to replace you…"

Ward narrowed his eyes as Garrett positioned the gun at Cheng again.

"Hey…" Ward said. "What are you doing?"

"He's kind of a whistle blower…" Garrett shrugged cocking the gun. "Can't have him running his mouth to someone else, can we?"

Ward stepped in front of Cheng and lifted his own gun. "That's not what we came here to do, Garrett. Remember the mission… to find the 0-8-4 and get out."

Garrett laughed and shook his head, lowering his gun. "Coulson smoothed out a lot of your rough edges, didn't he kid?"

Ward lowered his own gun. "Let's go."

He turned around to leave but was blocked by an old woman who was suddenly standing next to Cheng. She lifted her hands and placed one on his heart as the other cupped his face.

"_寻找回来的路。找到回家的路。这还不算太晚__。_"

His eyes widened as she smiled softly stroking his cheek.

"What the hell is she saying?" Garrett asked Cheng.

"I… I'm not sure…" Cheng answered shaking his head. "My grandmother suffers from dementia…. She says things sometimes that make no sense… not even to me…"

Garrett looked between her and Ward who was now frozen in her arms. Garrett pulled him back making Ward follow him out of the village.

* * *

Ward nursed the drink in front of him with a frown.

"_If we make it out of this… maybe we can… grab a drink… you and me…"_

He ran a finger up and down the side of the glass, feeling the condensation wet his fingers.

"What's on your mind, kid?" Garrett walked up behind him with a smile

"You almost killed that man today." Ward glanced up. "That's not what you brought me on board for."

Garrett's smile froze. "Like you're so innocent… didn't you just kill an innocent man a couple days ago…"

"I thought…"

"You thought he was the Clairvoyant."

Ward stood in anger. "And who is the Clairvoyant, huh Garrett?"

Garrett stepped back and shook his head with a chuckle. "Is that what this is all about? _Her_?"

"You lied to me." Ward growled. "I told you she was off limits."

"Whoa… Grant…" Garrett said holding up his hands. "It was nothing personal… I didn't know how much she meant to you at the time… I even helped you save her, remember? We gave up the drug to save her!"

Ward was seething. He took a step back. "She's just off limits."

"I got that." Garrett nodded.

Ward nodded before picking up the glass he'd been nursing and gulping down the rest of the amber liquid inside.

"I asked you if we crossed paths with Coulson's team, what you would do…" Garrett reminded him. "You said you would…"

"Neutralize the threat." Ward finished. "I got it."

"Does that include her?"

"Garrett…" Ward warned.

"Fine…." Garrett nodded with a shrug. "Off limits."

"I'm going to bed."

Ward turned to leave the room.

"Hey Grant…" Garrett called out to him. "What did that old woman say to you today?"

"I didn't understand her…" Ward turned and shrugged. "She probably had me confused with someone else."

Garret nodded with a tight smile. "Don't sleep in… we're out of here before the sun rises."

Ward nodded in understanding with a yawn and left the room.

Garrett narrowed his eyes as he watched him walk away. He took out his phone and dialed a number he had memorized. "Raina… get me everything you have on Skye… search that hard drive we got from Coulson. Report back to me with anything interesting you find."

He disconnected the line and tossed the phone aside. "What is so goddamn special about that orphan."

**Translation:** _Find your way back. Find your way home. It's not too late._


	5. Sleeping with the Ghost of You & Me

**A.N: **Not sure if anyone's noticed... but every chapter's title is from a song that inspired that particular chapter... Well, except for the first chapter because that title is pretty self explanatory, right? I know you guys probably figured it out but in case anyone was curious as to where those titles came from: Chapter 2 is from Phillip Phillips "Home" and Chapter 3 is Imagine Dragons "Demons". Chapter 4 was tricky because the original title was "I'd Burn a Thousand Moons Just to Light a Single Sun" but thought that to be too long so I had to shorten it to "I'd Burn a Thousand Moons to Light a Sun". Anyways, the song lyric is from All Good Things "Invincible". This chapter's title is a bit of a throwback. It's BBMak's "Ghost of You and Me". It's such a great song though. And I went through a boyband phase 15 years ago when I was in high school. And I just gave away my age... elementary school. 15 years ago was in elementary school. Damn it. Okay... never mind lol!I'll continue this trend til the end of the story. I've got some other titles up my sleeve. They'll all have something to do with that particular chapter. Also, I've heard a lot of speculation that fans are expecting for Ward to hook up with Raina. I don't think that's going to happen in the coming episodes but the more I thought about and the more I discussed it with a friend, the more the idea appealed to me. Sort of. A friend of mine posed the question, "what if Ward and Raina had a "thing" before he got on Coulson's team and met Skye? And I thought that was brilliant so here it is. It's a part of my story. I like the idea of Raina being jealous of Skye instead of May even though she knows that Ward was sleeping with May. I also like how cold she is. And how frigid he himself is toward her. No, I will not be writing Raina/Ward smut. So do not worry. But I do like making her a little nutty. She's brainwashed for crying out loud! She's not exactly all there mentally, right? And oh yeah... there's also another cliff hanger in this one. That's just how I roll. =}

* * *

"What's wrong with him?"

Garrett looked up from the papers scattered on the table in front of him and turned his head toward a back room that Raina was glancing toward. Ward had barricaded himself in there the moment they'd returned from China and he hadn't come out yet.

"He's just a little mad at me…" Garrett chuckled with a shrug. "I think it's about having that rookie of his shot or something."

"He really started to care for her…" Raina frowned.

Garrett looked up at her. "Jealous?"

"Not at all…" Raina shook her head. "Concerned… can we trust him still?"

"Ward?" Garrett nodded still completely focused on the papers Raina set aside for him to look over. "He's as loyal to me today as he was the day he stepped on that plane."

"Are you sure about that?"

Garrett looked up with a smile. "Positive."

* * *

The nightmares hadn't stopped. He'd been having them for weeks but they were getting stronger.

Darker.

He kept replaying the moment she was shot in his head. Usually, in his nightmares, it was Ian Quinn pulling the trigger. That bastard was lucky that he hadn't killed him in his sleep yet. Sometimes though, it was Garrett that shot her. And he would laugh when he did it. But what really scared him were the times he dreamed that it was him. And it might as well have been.

He'd told May that he didn't blame himself. At the time, he blamed Coulson for putting her in a position to get hurt. Then when he found out from Coulson a few nights ago that Garrett was The Clairvoyant, he found himself blaming his mentor. But the truth was that he should have blamed himself all along. It was his fault that she got hurt. It's always been his fault. He promised to protect her. He should have done a better job.

A knock on the door made him sit up in bed. He watched the door open slowly and Raina walk in. She closed it softly behind her.

"What is it?"

She sauntered toward the bed and crawled on top of him, kissing his jaw. "I was thinking of you…"

"Raina…" he warned pulling away from her.

"I know it's been a while but did you forget already?"

"You weren't exactly very welcoming when I got back…" he narrowed his eyes.

"If I had been you'd have been suspicious of me…" she smirked trailing a hand down his chest.

Ward firmly grabbed her hand and pushed her away. "Not now. I'm tired." He got out of the bed and rubbed his face.

"You're thinking about _her_ aren't you?"

"You know I only slept with May because she posed the biggest threat…" he was saying.

She cut him off. "I wasn't talking about Melinda May."

He turned back toward her and glared. "Leave _her_ out of this."

"So it's true then?" Raina asked. "You went and fell in love with her… rookie mistake, Agent Ward."

"Don't call me that."

"Why?" she asked with a pout. "Isn't that your title?"

"Not anymore…" he muttered looking away.

"Too bad…" she smiled seductively. "It was my favorite thing about you…" she got on her knees and started unbuttoning the front of her dress on the bed. "Final offer…"

"I'm leaving…" he warned. "And when I get back, you better not be here."

He walked out of the room and slammed the door behind him.

"Trouble in paradise?" a taunting voice called out.

Ward walked up to Garrett who was sitting in a chair drinking from a mug with a S.H.I.E.L.D. logo on it. It was almost like he was mocking the entire fact that they'd betrayed everyone.

"Does she really have to be here?"

"I told you all those years ago… don't get involved in any mission…" Garrett shook his head taking a sip from the mug. "Didn't I warn you? Don't mix work with pleasure?"

"Fine." Ward answered. "Do we really need her though?"

"Raina is an asset to our team, Grant…" Garrett answered. "So I need you to put on your big boy pants and get over it… or take them off and get on with it… whatever."

Ward narrowed his eyes. "What are we doing, Garrett?"

"I'm not sure I know what you mean…"

"We used to have purpose…" Ward continued. "We used to actually have a reason to do what it is that we do… but ever since you started the Centipede program, I'm having a hard time seeing what the purpose of all this is…"

"Purpose?" Garrett asked standing up. "You want a purpose?" He stood in front of Ward. "The purpose of all this is to be prepared next time. Before another attack like the one in New York takes place, I want to neutralize that threat. It's us or them, kid… you chose a side… now play nice…"

Ward shook his head. "I'm going for a walk. Get her out of my room by the time I get back."

"If you'd prefer someone else to be waiting in your bed, I can arrange that for you…"

Ward stopped.

"Perhaps someone a little more petite, long brown hair with golden streaks that light up in the sun…" Garrett mocked. "Is that more of your speed these days?"

Ward turned around. "Leave her out of this."

"I must say, Grant…" Garrett continued. "You're very protective of her… is that going to cause a problem down the line?"

Ward crossed his arms in defiance. "No, sir."

"Good." Garrett nodded with a smile. "I'll rein Raina in… you go get that fresh air…"

* * *

She opened her eyes suddenly. She'd been having the same dream a lot lately. It was always them inside that janitor's closet. The scene of their first and only kiss. She'd been trying to remember what he'd told her that day, in that moment. He'd talked about protecting her and asked her out for a drink. But he'd been sad. He'd even sounded worried. In her dreams, things ended differently. He'd come back and they'd run away from the fight. Not that she or even he would ever do that. They were soldiers… fighters. But in her dreams, apparently she would have been glad to give up everything if it meant she could still have him.

She sat up with a sigh.

Coulson had booked them all in a cheap motel. She looked over her shoulder to see him snoring softly in the other bed. Fitz and Simmons, despite hardly talking to one another these days, had bunked together. And Coulson had put May in a room with Triplett. Skye overheard Coulson tell their new team member to keep an eye on her. She frowned knowing that Coulson now trusted a stranger more than he trusted May.

She stepped out of bed and walked over to the bathroom. She stepped inside and closed the door before turning on the light so she wouldn't wake him. She was pretty sure he hadn't actually slept in days. It looked like she hadn't either. She had dark rings under her eyes. Her skin had gotten paler. She looked fatigued.

She still didn't feel safe.

She almost expected _them_ to burst through that door and threaten to kill her or one of her team mates... Her family... Skye wondered if it ever came down to it, just how far she would go to protect them. But he'd been her family once too. He was as much her family as Fitz, Simmons, Coulson and even May were. She'd do anything to protect them. But she'd do anything to _save_ him. If only he'd let her.

Placing her hands on the sink she leaned closer to the mirror.

Taking a deep breath she whispered, "You've got to let him go, Skye…"

It wasn't that simple. She almost wished it was. She wanted to hate him. More than anything she wanted to feel rage. But she didn't. She'd even hoped for indifference. But that's not what she felt either. What was it? Disappointment? Sadness? Used? Coulson had told them all that he should have known. Raina knew things about him that he'd recently told Ward. He should have realized how she'd found out but back then they thought they were dealing with something supernatural. A real clairvoyant… Not a physical person with a man on the inside. Coulson hadn't expected one of his oldest friends to have turned on him and the organization they'd sworn to defend. And she hadn't expected that the man who'd taught her to protect herself would be someone she would need protection from one day.

She sighed and turned off the light before opening the door and stepping back into the room. She quietly got back in bed and settled in as comfortably as she could. But the sheets were cold. They'd probably always be cold from now on. She closed her eyes and let out another sigh. She braced herself for the nightmares that would undoubtedly come and the rest of the sleepless night she had ahead.

* * *

When he returned everyone was asleep. He hadn't expected that he'd be out for so long but he'd walked further than he thought he would. He'd even wondered if his subconscious had taken over and he was physically trying to walk back to her.

_Find your way back. Find your way home. It's not too late._

Garrett had hounded him for a translation. He was glad that Garrett hadn't cared enough to keep asking though and that he cared even less to actually look it up himself. Those words had hit him like a bucket of cold water. That old lady was wrong though. She didn't know what he'd done. There was no way back for him. He could only move forward. There was no place for him back there with them. They'd never welcome him home. Not after all that he'd done. He'd killed four people in two days in cold blood. Three of those people were friends of theirs. He knew that.

Fitz wouldn't slap his back in a playful way ever again. Simmons would never be beating him at Scrabble again and as much as it annoyed him; he secretly loved that she could. Coulson wouldn't want to talk about the cellist to him, even though he liked hearing that story. Not because he used that intel to report to Garrett but because he genuinely liked how happy Coulson was telling it. He'd never spar with May again. He'd learned a lot from The Calvary the last few months. But what hurt the most was that _she'd_ never look at him the same way again. He'd never get to have that drink with her. They'd never get to have their much needed talk. What would he have told her anyway? The truth? Maybe he would have. It was burning him inside and he needed to get it out. She was the only person he could have truly trusted with that secret. Especially if he'd promised to turn around and put his loyalties in something else… or in someone else. Had he already? He and Garrett hadn't exactly been seeing eye to eye lately. Had his loyalties changed without him realizing. He knew he didn't stand for S.H.I.E.L.D. anymore than he stood for Hydra at the moment. The only thing he cared about was her… protecting her… she was his mission now.

He heard hushed voices and walked over to the wall leaning around the corner to find Raina and Garrett talking.

"You said to tell you when I found something interesting…"

"What did you find?" Garrett asked.

"You went to China looking for an object of unknown origin…" Raina continued. "Could an 0-8-4 be a person?"

"I… I'm not sure…" Garrett shook his head. "Maybe… I've never heard of something like that though…"

"Because the 0-8-4 that S.H.I.E.L.D. lost track of…" Raina lifted the hard drive Ward had gotten from Skye. "Was a baby… who was put into the foster system… by a deceased Agent Avery. Hydra assassinated her twenty-four years ago."

"So… what you're saying is…"

"Apparently, that girl you asked me to look into…" Raina smiled. "She's the one you've been looking for… now you've got more reason to get her. The GH-325 and the fact that she's an 0-8-4."

Garrett smiled slowly. "That explains why the GH-325 didn't affect her like it did Coulson… Skye's not from this earth."

Raina smiled. "I think your mission has officially changed, Agent Garrett."

Garrett nodded with a grin. "Guess we're going to have to cross paths with Coulson and his team after all…"

Ward's eyes widened. Skye was an 0-8-4? Did she know? Did Coulson? What did that mean exactly?

"What about _him_?" Raina asked.

Ward hid further against the wall.

"He's not going to let you just take her and torture her for answers…" Raina said crossing her arms.

"Oh… he won't have a say…. He'll fall in line… Just like he always does." Garrett said with a smile. "Hail Hydra."

Raina smiled slowly. "Hail Hydra."

Ward stepped back before they found him listening. He snuck into his room and closed the door quietly. Skye was an 0-8-4. Garrett was looking for Skye. He paced the room. Skye was in danger.

He lunged for his bag on the floor and started throwing anything that would fit in it. He'd warn them. He'd find them and warn her about what Garrett knew.

He stopped. What if Garrett found her before he could get to them though?

Sitting on his bed, he made another decision that would send him in another downward spiral. He'd have to stay onboard and pretend to help Garrett find her. He'd have to stay two steps ahead of Garrett the entire time.

Ward frowned. She'd never forgive him if she believed that he was helping Garrett hunt her down. But if it meant that it would keep her safe, then he'd do it. And he wouldn't regret it.


	6. This House No Longer Feels Like Home

**A.N: **This is a VERY important chapter... probably not at all what you were expecting... but it was always leading up to this. Hopefully, it'll live up to all of your expectations. The story isn't over yet. There are 10 chapters mapped out and an epilogue that will lead into this story's sequel... which I am still working on... So stay tuned for that. As always, I live for your comments about the story... so if you liked it, let me know... if you hated it, let me know... I love knowing what you think and how I can improve. Because there's always room for improvement, right? Anyways... here it is... :)

* * *

"I've found them."

Ward looked up from the rifle he was cleaning. "Hmm?"

Garrett gave him a menacing grin. "Your old teammates, son… Raina and I found them."

"Where?"

"They're at one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s safe houses." Garrett shrugged. "It's mighty stupid for Coulson to have gone to one of them, if you ask me. He had to know they're not exactly safe anymore, right?"

"What if it's a trap?" Raina asked.

"Coulson is too busy hiding to come up with any effective plans right now." Garrett shook his head. "No, he stopped for something…" Garrett turned to Ward. "Or someone…"

"Where is it?" Ward asked.

"The safe house?"

Ward nodded.

"Portland." Garrett said before turning to Raina with a grin. "The Cellist."

"We going after her?" Ward asked.

"It's a good idea to have some kind of leverage, don't you think?"

Raina nodded enthusiastically. "I agree!"

"Then I guess we're going to Portland."

* * *

"Why exactly are we here?" Fitz asked to no one in particular.

"I need to find someone…" Coulson answered anyway.

"Are we looking for her?" May asked. "The Cellist?"

"I just need to make sure that she's safe." Coulson nodded. "With everything that's going on…"

May shook her head. "I understand… we have to keep the ones we love safe."

He nodded with a slight smile. "Thank you… I won't be long…"

"AC…" Skye called out. "You think this is a good idea? I mean… she thinks you died…"

Coulson shrugged. "It's a different world that we're living in… I'm sure once I explain everything, she'll understand."

* * *

To say that she didn't take his resurrection well would be the understatement of the century.

After screaming for a few minutes, Audrey finally passed out from exhaustion. It probably helped that Skye knocked her out though.

That's how they'd ended up at the safe house where they were currently hiding. Fitz had been able to disable the alarm but he wasn't sure it was quick enough for anyone to not notice that they were there.

Skye sat at the counter rapidly typing on her laptop. Fitz was currently searching the small apartment for any snacks that weren't expired yet. Simmons sat enjoying her first cup of tea in days. Triplett and May stood watch; one of them was positioned near a window and the other by the front door.

Coulson and been sitting on a small coffee table, anxiously watching Audrey as she slept. When she began to stir, he sat up straighter. He watched her eyes as they opened slowly before widening until she sat up on the couch quickly and in shock. "Phil?"

"Hi…" he smiled sheepishly.

"Am I dreaming?" she asked. "Am I dead?"

"No…" he shook his head. "Neither actually… it's me…"

"But you're alive…" she stated. "How is this possible?"

"It's a very long story…" he said with a forced smile. "One that I don't have all the answers to yet… I'm sorry… but it is me…"

"What's going on?" she asked looking around her at the other people in the room. "Who are these people?"

"This is my team." He said with a smile. "We're here to protect you."

"Protect me?" she snapped her neck toward him. "From what?"

"Hydra…"

"Those Nazi wannabes that are trying to take over?" she asked.

He nodded. "I work for S.H.I.E.L.D." he looked around the room. "Worked… for S.H.I.E.L.D."

"You…?"

He nodded. "I died before the battle of New York."

"But you just said you were alive…"

"I was brought back to life by a friend…" he finally answered. "Like I said… I don't have all the answers but I just want to make sure that you are safe."

"Coulson…" Skye looked up. "We need to do this fast… I've just got to take her photo and I can print the new passports and IDs."

"What?" Audrey glanced back at the young woman at the computer. "What is she talking about, Phil?"

"Hydra is after me… after us…" he nodded toward the other people in the room. "And they'll get to me anyway they know how… including by getting you…"

Her eyes widened.

"Skye is an expert at deleting people and creating new identities for them…" Phil nodded toward the young hacker. "She's creating one for you now… we're going to put you on a train and you're going to cross the border into Canada. After that… you can go anywhere you want."

"Phil?"

"Audrey… I am trying to protect you." He took a deep breath. "I need to know that you will be okay."

She nodded. "Can I ever see you again?"

He let a slow smile spread on his face. "Maybe one day… but right now, we have to stay away from each other… it's the only way to keep you safe."

She rubbed her face. "You came all the way back here to make sure I'd be safe?"

"Yes." He nodded.

"Okay."

His eyes widened.

"Okay…." She nodded once. "I'll do it. I'll disappear."

"You can never contact anyone you've ever known again… not your parents… family… friends… no one…" he warned her.

"Will they be safe?"

"As long as Hydra believes you're dead, they'd have no reason to come after them." Skye answered. "I'm…. killing you… essentially." She scrunched her face. "Sorry…"

Audrey smiled softly. "I understand. I'll do whatever it takes to keep them safe."

"I want you to keep youself safe…" Coulson said taking her hands in his. "Let me do the rest."

She nodded touching her forehead to his. "I never thought I'd see you again… and now that I have… you're slipping through my fingers… again…"

"At least we'll both be alive."

She smiled softly. "Yes… at least…"

"Okay…" Skye hopped off the counter and picked up a small camera that she had next to her laptop. "You ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be…" Audrey stood and turned toward Coulson. "Are you sure that you can't come with me?"

He shook his head. "I have to finish this…"

"Come find me when this is all over…" she said with a smile and leaned in to kiss his cheek.

He smiled. "I will."

* * *

Coulson and May had taken Audrey to the train station. The rest of them had stayed behind waiting for them to return. Skye was still sitting at her laptop quietly working.

"What are you doing over there, girl?" Triplett finally asked.

"Making sure there aren't any Hydra agents in the area." She muttered.

"Probably a good idea…" he shrugged.

She looked up and smiled before looking at her computer screen again.

Simmons paced the floor of the small apartment frantically. "They should have returned by now…"

"Coulson probably wanted some extra time to…" Fitz answered absentmindedly. He looked up when he felt everyone's eyes on him. "Well, don't tell me you lot weren't thinkin' it."

"Fitz…." Simmons said shaking her head.

The door opening caused everyone to stand on alert. They all sighed in relief when they found Coulson and May walking through the door.

"Thank God…" Skye breathed. "Simmons was really starting to worry."

"Like I was the only one…" Simmons mumbled with an eye roll.

Coulson smiled fondly at the young biochemist before looking up at them. "She's safe. She's on a train heading to-"

Skye's laptop started beeping. She turned toward the screen and cursed.

"What is it?"

Skye looked up at Coulson and frowned. "It's him…"

"You've been monitoring him?" May asked.

"Just a few aliases to see if anything came up…" Skye answered. "I've been running face recognition… using some of the satellites that were still up and running…"

"Where is he?" Coulson asked.

"In Portland. Nearby… Coulson… he was a couple blocks from Audrey's apartment. They were probably looking for her." She said. "We need to go."

"No."

They all turned to him.

"Coulson…" May said through clenched teeth. "We're not fully armed. We can't take them on… not with the little that we have."

"We're not going to take them on…" Coulson answered her. "I'm staying… the rest of you are leaving. Now…"

They all started to protest.

"It's not up for debate." He continued. "I will hold them off while you both get Skye and Fitzsimmons to a safer place."

"Coulson…." Skye started.

"They're here for you, Skye…" Coulson shook his head. "Garrett has always wanted you for whatever reason. Maybe he knows that you're an 0-8-4… either way… our number one priority is to keep you safe."

"But…" she started to protest again.

"No… you're leaving. That's the end of it."

She nodded and started packing up her things quickly. Fitz and Simmons followed her lead and started getting their things together while Triplett helped.

"May…" Coulson turned toward. "I need you to make sure that she is safe… no matter what it takes… Please promise me that-"

"No…"

"What?" he asked.

"I'm staying…"

"May…"

"Coulson…. Triplett can get them out. I am staying with you…" May said. "I told you once that I had your back… and I meant it."

He smiled softly. "Okay…"

They turned toward the rest of the team.

"You're not coming?" Skye asked.

May shook her head. "I'll stay behind and help Coulson hold them off."

Simmons hugged Coulson tightly. "Please be careful…" she whispered before letting go.

Fitz pat his back and Triplett shook his hand.

"I'll see you on the other side, sir…" he told the senior agent.

Skye walked up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Stay safe…" She turned toward May and gave her a bone crushing hug as well. "Take care of him…" she whispered to the older woman.

May hugged her back. "We'll see you soon…"

Skye took a step back and let Triplett lead them out of the apartment. He handed her a gun in the hallway. "You know how to use one of these?"

She nodded. "Yeah… I had a good teacher."

* * *

They slowly walked down the dark corridor.

"I'm not sure why we didn't bring any back up…" Garrett was mumbling. "We could use the extra help to take out Coulson's team."

"I can take Triplett and May…" Ward shook his head. "We didn't need anyone else. They would have seen us coming."

Garrett nodded. "You're right."

"Is this the safe house?" Ward whispered.

Garrett held a finger to his lips and nodded. He counted to three silently and signaled Ward to kick down the door. Ward was the first one in the room and was knocked down instantly. He turned over on his back to see May standing over him.

"The Calvary…" he smiled slowly. "Been waiting for this."

"I know the feeling." She lifted her foot to smash it down on his chest but he rolled over and jumped on his feet.

Garrett and Coulson were already fighting inside the apartment. Ward watched both his mentors attacking each other and flinched. He almost missed the swift punch that May threw at him but he deflected and was able to throw her against the wall. He tried to kick her but she moved out of his way before his foot could land on his target.

"I beat you once, May…" he said. "Or did you forget."

"You're not holding that staff anymore…" she was smiling. "And I have no problem kicking your ass."

He laughed shaking his head. "You haven't changed…"

"And you're still a talker."

They circled one another. Ward tried to keep an eye on Coulson and Garrett but in doing so, he missed May punching him. He was taken aback by the force of her hit. He tasted the blood on his split lip before he could react. But he was still able to wrap his arms around her in a stronghold.

"Stop… fighting me…" he whispered to her.

"Never…" she spat out.

He looked over head to find Garrett had knocked Coulson down. Garrett was picking up a nearby gun.

"Sorry, May…" he muttered before hitting his head against hers hard enough to knock her out. He turned toward Coulson and Garrett. Ward slammed himself into Garrett knocking the gun out of his hand. Coulson watched the two of them scuffle on the ground. He looked around and found the gun, kicking it toward Ward, who picked it up and pointed it right at Garrett.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, kid?"

Ward's hand trembled as he held the gun, pointing it at Garrett's head. "What I should have done a long time ago…"

Garrett stood up slowly. "So that's it then… you're choosing a side to stand on…?"

"I'm not on any side, Garrett…" Ward held the gun tighter. "But you threatened my family… you threatened… her…"

"So it is about that alien bitch then?" Garrett laughed. "Ward, I get it…. You're sweet on her… fine… we'll get what we need and you can have what's left of her."

Ward was shaking his head. "You won't go anywhere near her."

Garrett laughed. "Are you just going to shoot me, kid?"

Ward cocked the gun in his hand, his finger twitching on the trigger.

"So you choose them? Is that it?" Garrett asked.

"I choose her." Ward answered.

"Then get on with it… do it…" Garrett said making Ward take a step back. Garrett screamed. "DO IT!"

He lunged for Ward but an ear shattering gunshot stopped him in his tracks. Coulson watched as his old friend fell to his knees with a fatal gunshot to his gut. Garrett fell back, spitting up blood. Ward stood over his body and pointed the gun at him. Garrett's glassy eyes stared back at him in shock as he whispered, "hail Hydra…"

Ward shot him in the head. The glassy eyes were not vacant and staring back at him.

Coulson slowly stood and walked over to the younger man. He touched Ward's hand and took the gun from his lifeless fingers. Ward fell to the ground.

Coulson wrapped his arms around him pulling the younger man close. "It's okay…"

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…" Ward mumbled over and over again choking on his words.

Coulson rubbed his back. "It's okay… I forgive you… It's okay…"

The younger man sobbed in his arms. Tears pricked Coulson's eyes.

"Shh…" he soothed. "It's okay…"

Ward held on tightly to the older man and cried. He didn't want to let go of the only true father figure he'd ever known. He cried for the man that he'd just killed who at one point had treated him like a son. He cried for the childhood he'd lost and the life he'd given up. He cried because even though it was over and Garrett was gone, he knew that he still couldn't stay. He was in more danger now. Hydra would want revenge now that he's killed one of their high ranking leaders. But most of all, he cried because he'd turned his back on the only home he'd ever known. And now it was too late to go back. He'd never see any of them again. To keep them safe, he would have to stay away.


End file.
